Why beauty is not everything

Perfect faces.
Perfect bodies.
But perfect lives? No.

We live in a world where being beautiful is considered to be the only thing you need for a perfect life. In this cruel world, we make beautiful souls feel bad about their flaws and we encourage an unrealistic standard of beauty upon adolescents, making them feel inadequate about themselves. But beauty is not everything.

Yes, there was an age when I too, desired to be the most beautiful and the most popular in school, and when I realised that I was not any of that; I was forced to doubt my own worth. In fact I remember that I once wrote in a book,
“Things I hate about myself :
I am a cow.
I have a really fat nose.
I am so ugly.”

I shudder when I try to remember the day I felt so hurt; I decided to write an ill purposed and mean letter to my own self.
Years have passed since that night and a lot of things have changed. I have become quite a different person from the person I was that night. That young girl knew nothing. She only knew her first heartbreak. She only knew hurt. She only knew pain. And those were the things not worth knowing. I think, that if she could see me today; see me owning who I am and wearing my flaws on my body like jewels- she would be very proud. Because I know that that day, she only hoped she could someday grow to love herself. And now she has.

Dear young boys and girls, don’t conform to these beauty standards. Please learn to be ignorant about these unrealistic standards set up by a very profit driven world. All, these magazines and advertisers want, is for you to find flaws in yourself and guilt you so much about them that you end up buying their products. It’s that simple. They want you to feel bad about growing natural body hair, they want you to feel bad about those freckles that look cute and child like on you. They want you to feel bad about your hair-  they want you to find a flaw with each part of your being and be unhappy about it. These things that I have listed are not even flaws – they are characteristics. They are you. They are beautiful because they make you. Don’t let anybody shame you for being you.

As a kid, my generation had it easy, I think. Our validation came from things like a guy asking a girl out and when children played games like stare, dare or truth, the attractive kid got the most attention. But this generation and the generations beyond it are going to find it tougher to get validation. Today your self worth is judged by things such as ‘likes, followers and comments’. But stop it before it gets worse. Don’t let your follower count define you. Don’t let the likes and comments on your picture be the test of your popularity. Let these be what they really are. Virtual – bearing no relation to reality. And trust me, they’ll never be anything more.
When we stop asking others to validate us, we avoid any scope of us ever doubting ourselves.

If you really want to be popular or if you really want to feel beautiful, just smile. No really, trust me – that’s it. Smile and laugh and find fun in everything. Life will be so much more beautiful.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and you are the beholder, as Salma Hayek once pointed out. What you think is beautiful, is beautiful and that’s the end of that.
And to end on a clichéd but a a very true note – it’s what inside that matters.


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